I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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