I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
