you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize