Whod you bang
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
