So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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