Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry