she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
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Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
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I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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