The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
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oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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