That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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