Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
