coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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