I have demons in me.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
