You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
