idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
