Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Randomize