I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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