Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
