I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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