big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
The feeling are messing with the penis
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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