She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
