He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
