she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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