I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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