I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
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I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
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I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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