Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
