That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize