he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
