There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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