WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...