You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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