why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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