I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
