woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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