Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
