My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
