new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize