Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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