You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
