Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
