He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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