Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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