are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize