Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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