wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
PANTIES FOUND
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