so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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