that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
