Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Randomize
