Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize