Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize