walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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