so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
So many bounce houses so little time
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
